After 50 questions, Steve Brass knew the woman sitting in front of him was the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. Although it was suggested to only ask 50 questions, Brass knew he had to ask one more.
Will you marry me? Without any hesitation, she said “yes”.
The road to finally meeting his wife was not a smooth drive. After multiple unsuccessful relationships, Brass realized that he was going about relationships the wrong way.
“I had relationships that in retrospect were incompatible and toxic. I decided I needed to change my strategy in how I asked questions,” said Brass.
Brass took that even one step further when he decided to write a book about it called “Love Match – 50 Questions to Find Your Mate”. With years of play writing, song writing and book writing experience, Brass put his hands to the keyboard as he typed up one question after another.
“The questions weren’t thought up just by me. I interviewed couples, straight, gay, singles and so on,” said Brass. “I asked them what is one question you would ask someone to get to know them better.”
Little by little the questions were narrowed down to 50. The questions are to help couples find whether they are compatible for each other or not. There are five pillars of compatibility that the book walks couples through – chemistry, cash, communication, caring and commitment. Before delving into these categories, the book starts couples with the question: What kind of relationship are you looking for?
“You need to know when you start what you want,” said Brass. “I call it the “dirty socks test”. Are you a neat freak and is your partner a slob? It’s those small things that can tear away at a relationship.”
He started writing the book in 2011 and six months later met Donna, who is now his wife, through mutual friends. He asked if she would want to go through the 50 questions, which she gladly agreed to.
“We explored all 50 questions and the beauty of this is we got married because of the book,” said Brass.
The book was released in June of this year and is available on Amazon or in Antigone Books down on 4th Avenue. Apart from writing, Brass does writing workshops and presentations on his book.